Weekend Recap

Because J had to work the night shift Saturday night, our whole schedule was a bit thrown off this weekend. We didn't really do much other than go to the playground on Saturday, so I'm just going to share with you a few photos I snapped over the weekend. (By the way, I totally forgot to snap a photo of our pizza on Friday, but a) it was just regular ol' pepperoni and b) I was so hungry by the time it was done that I just shoved it into my face without a second thought. Hopefully I'll have another pizza for you next week!)

Friday:

 

was a gorgeous day.

 

Especially for a run.

 

Even though it was a couple nights early, I tried to get a picture of the "super moon" Friday night. Which turned out to be good, because I couldn't even see the moon Saturday or Sunday nights due to it being so darn cloudy here. 

Saturday:

 We played tag...

And red light green light. :)

Sunday was a miserable day. The weather was miserable, we were miserable because of the weather and because of our messed-up sleep schedules... Just miserable. So I didn't take a picture of one single thing.

Something occurred to me Saturday night, though. California is nice, it's great... but it kind of feels like a vacation that won't end. And I just want to go home. It feels like our life is completely on hold while we're out here. We want to have more babies, buy a house, get a second dog, but all of those things have to wait until we get back to Nebraska (or we would at least prefer them to, anyway). 

And then, being home with E all day, every day, for the next few months until her dad returns from deployment, with no family out here to lend a hand, and no close friends that we can ask to watch her... I'm about to lose it. I feel so guilty saying that, because I know there are many mothers that would give anything to be able to spend as much time with their kids as I do with mine (and I am really grateful for it), but I can't just smile and pretend like everything is fine when it's not.

So instead of continuing to complain about it and feel sorry for myself, I'm going to try to come up with solutions to these issues. There are some things I just can't do anything about, but that doesn't mean I can't do anything about any of it. So today, I am taking E to the child development center to inquire about enrolling her in the part-day preschool program they offer a couple days a week. She wouldn't be going to daycare full-time (which would be ridiculous, there's no need for her to go full-time), but she would be exposed to the same kids over and over on a bi-weekly basis and hopefully be able to make friends. Plus I would be able to get a few hours to myself to clean or run errands or work out or *gasp* go shopping without constantly refilling juice cups or answering a million questions. If the price is reasonable, I have a feeling this one change could make all the difference and will make the next few months much more bearable. 

Sorry to unload on you all like that, but this is a safe space and I know how hard it is to admit when something is wrong, especially as mothers.

I hope you all had a lovely weekend, and have many wonderful things to look forward to this week!